Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Don't put your life on hold until your married.

Hey Darling, 

I've wanted to write you for a long, long time.
Today seemed like it was finally the time and I hope that you'll hear me out.

Lately, you have really been on my heart.
I see so many of you longing for a love that is true and real. 

I see so many of you left feeling lonely, and seeing the circumstance of 
singleness as some kind of illness or identity.
 and I know how you feel,
because I've been there.

I have seen so many of you put your life on hold until you meet someone special..

I have seen so many of you make the decision to sleep.. To just sleep your life away until this dashing handsome man comes  driving   riding on his noble steed to come and kiss you awake.

And you know what? I was a complete victim to this when I was single. I was asleep throughout my whole single life.

All I did was dream, day dream and then dream again.

These dreams were all about How  I would one day meet my husband, how many kids I wanted, when will I meet him, oh, and my personal not so favorite but did so often was I wonder if _________ is the one!?! I had a lot of those ones.

And when my eye often caught Marriage Material I often day dreamed about them. I guess you could say my mind was pretty booked with dreams..

Ladies, May I encourage you today?

As a Married mama, I see now the true blessing that singleness really is..

It's a beautiful, strong and powerful situation to be in. Though the world may say otherwise but it's true!

I'm not saying Marriage isn't because it certainly is! But in a different way.. They're both awesome!
But don't miss out on the blessing and gifts of singleness because singleness is just a stepping stone before marriage.. It's a preparation and much more than that.. And if your not happy being single you're  certainly not going to be happy being married either! Because you'll be lacking the one thing that can keep you satisfied.. Jesus

You see singleness is not just a preparation .. It's an opportunity to fully seek after God with everything you are! To know Him, develop  an intimacy with Him, and allowing Him to show you things beyond imagination  Without the distractions of marriage and babies. It doesn't have to be a process of waiting.. It could be a process of amazing opportunities.. And once you realize the single life doesn't have to be a miserable, waiting season I really believe you'll enjoy it much better!

I'm certainly not saying that you shouldn't dream..  That's far from what I'm saying here.. I believe dreaming big is so important and I'm a proud supporter.. But It certainly shouldn't come before God's plan and His thoughts in Your life.. Putting your dreams and thoughts that can lead up to unhealthy thoughts and decisions before Jesus is no bueno and leads to a dead end where no dreams are fulfilled..

So ladies, I encourage you to let go of the 24/7 day dreaming and start some 24/7 Jesus dreaming..  He'll show you things that your own dreaming can't  even imagine or comprehend. And express way more undying, unconditional love for you than ever imagined..  

His love is real ya'll! Don't wait to be married to finally figure that out.

So many women have the understanding that romance and love can only be found in relationships... That you won't feel treasured, cherished, and loved until we meet our Mr.  And for the women who feel that way I can totally understand why they'd be desperate and lonely during they're single life.. Because what girl doesn't want to be cherished, adored and loved? As women were were created to love these things and to desire these things. We were not only created to love God but to also be loved by Him.  To have a relationship with Him. 

But what is not seen is that even when she does  find a man who does love her, cherishes her, and adores her.. It won't be enough. Maybe at first. Maybe longer. But eventually he'll get old.. The sweet things he had done for her won't be enough and because as human's we're not perfect and he will mess up.. He'll forget about her some days, some days he won't be able to fill her every need, some day's he'll be to tired to spend time with her, and some days he'll rather hang out with his bros.. And you know what? That's okay, it's normal, healthy and it does not mean he's not a marriage material man.  But you'll still need more, you'll still thirst for more because the man you have slept day dreaming about, the man you have waited for all these years will soon no longer be of interest to you anymore because when it was him, his love that you thought you longed for it was really a more perfect love you desperately needed. A love that can only be given by  perfection.. All that time what you were really seeking was Jesus.. The creator of Love and romance.

I really hope I made my point across.. Darlings, What I'm saying is as single ladies.. you are not a  lesser woman.. You are not just a girl and being Married doesn't make you loved, a real woman, or a respectable woman.  It is Jesus who makes you loved and it is your attitude that makes you a real respectable woman and how you handle your single life.

I'm telling you this not with empty words. But with experience. Don't be the girl in need of a man to come and rescue her from the life of singleness.  But be fully independent on Jesus and He will fill your every desire and that will make your future marriage with the man after God's own heart even stronger, more loved filled and powerful. Don't wait to fall in love with Jesus until you're married. Do what you can now to strengthen your relationship with Him. Go on missions trips, start a blog, write a book, start a sisterhood community. Get involved and let God use your singleness to do powerful things. 

                                                                       Love ya, girl! And keep shining for Him.
                                                                                             xoxo- Heather Leigh.


Alycia Grayce (Crowley Party) said...

Loved this! I am married, which is great! But so is not being married. Whenever I meet people rushing to try and get to that place in life I tell them, ENJOY BEING SINGLE! Life has so many beautiful seasons, and if we are constantly wishing for the next we won't fully enjoy and get what we need to from the one we are in. Just love yourself, God, and life, and everything will work out the way it is supposed to!

Hannah Megan Boyd said...

THANK YOU for this post! Exactly what i needed to hear today!

Anonymous said...

Such a great post! Thank you for writing this because it is so true! God should be our first love and singleness is the perfect time to grow close to Him. You are such an encouragement:) Have a blessed day!