Friday, August 17, 2012

Lady lessons: Giving your single life to Christ.

 Happy Friday my single sisters, This morning God has really laid a burden on my heart to write directly to you today. I have been thinking about you often. And I have been reading many of your facebook, and twitter posts regarding to wanting a boyfriend, wanting someone to hold you, kiss you and make you feel special. I have seen you looking lonely, and I have seen an emptiness inside your heart that your hoping a knight in shining armor can fulfill, I have seen you looking in all the wrong places, doing the wrong things, and doing everything you can to please someone who is only bringing you hurt. Well ladies, this is exactly what I'm going to be talking with you about today.
I'm gonna start off by telling you today that I know how you feel. TRUST ME! I have spent many years single. In fact I didn't have a boyfriend until I was nineteen years of age. So, please listen to me when I say I am not speaking empty words. I remember that lonely feeling. That feeling you get when your friends have dates for prom, when your friends cancel on you because their boyfriends want to take them out, and having to be a good friend by listening to your friend talk about their first kiss or when he held her hand for the first time.  I remember those feelings. And because I do. The Lord wants me to encourage you with these words.


He knows how you feel.
I know you may be thinking "How in the world can God know how I feel? How can Jesus ever be lonely when He's The Lord of the universe? Well, think about it. When He came to earth He experienced every emotion we experience. He was rejected and denied  by His friends,  tormented by soldiers, and spat on by millions of people. He had people yelling in His face, beating Him, and blaspheming Him. And when He died on The cross for us, God had to turn His head from Jesus for the first and last time because Jesus bore the sin of the world. And God cannot look upon sin. That right there had to have been the most lonely feeling ever experienced. You can't even imagine it. And He bore that so you would not have to experience that kind of loneliness.

He filled my heart, He can fill yours.
If you would have known me in my teen early years. You definitely would have labeled me as "boy crazy" Every time I went out I was on the lookout for boys, I had posters on my wall of cuties, loved romanced movies, and you would often find me day dreaming of how I would meet my future hunk when I should have been doing my studies. And even though I didn't have a bf for Valentines day. I still celebrated it by my lonesome. And if I was lucky I had other single girlfriends to join me ( Which didn't happen often). But you see, It didn't have to be that way at all! And I wish I would have realized that long before I did. I had that void in my heart. And I thought that void could be filled if I had a boyfriend.. But you see. You can't fill that void with a boy or man. That void can only be filled with the one who loves you the most and more than any man or boy can. And that's Jesus. My heart was changed at the age of seventeen when I went to camp with my Baptist church. To be honest I don't remember all the sermons that well. And  certainly not good enough to quote any. But what really hit me was the worship. That was the first time the presence of The Holy Spirit overcame me and it was the first time I was brought to tears. My life was forever changed. He was The Love of my life and lover of my soul. Worship really brought me to a oneness with Him. I realized He was really all I needed. And  I realized I didn't even want to play the whole "dating game" that all of my friends played. As much as I wanted a boyfriend I just knew that game wasn't for me and that it certainly wouldn't make me stronger with my relationship with God. So, I made a commitment that I wasn't going to date by worldly standards, I wasn't going to try and date all the fishes in the sea. I wanted to do it God's way and only His way. I made the decision that I was only going to date one man, say "I love you" to one man, to hold hands with one man, to kiss one man, and to marry one man. So that my future husband could have my everything. Because I thought my man deserves that much from me!  And I knew it would be amazing because that's how God plans things. Some supported my decision, some said I was setting myself up for disappointment and self condemnation, and I even had a youth pastors wife tell me that wasn't realistic. But you know what? I wasn't going for what was "realistic" in the worldly realm. I was going for  the realistic in God's realm. Because in Him all things are possible and I know He wanted what was best for me. And I knew His perfect plan was for me to live a life without the heartbreak of a boy. And suddenly that void in my heart was filled with the love of Jesus.
Giving your single life to God.
Now I'm not saying that because the void was filled I didn't have crushes or interests and I didn't have lonely moments. Of course I did! I was actually very interested  in a few men  before Leon came into my life. And I was certain they were my future holy hunks. But I told God I had no interest to be with them if He didn't want me to be. So, I prayed for departure with them or loss of interest. And that was exactly what happened. One went to college and I lost interest with the rest. And I have spent some nights crying because I wanted to be held and cherished by a man. It doesn't mean a void was still there. It simply means that I'm human, a woman, and I was created to be loved by a man and to be cherish by a man. God knew this. And all those nights He was right there to comfort me. Telling me and reminding me of what He had planned. He had that knight in shining armor waiting for me. I just had to be patient. He reminded me to give my single life to Him. And let me tell you ladies it's the best decision you can make! It was certainly the best one I made.  Jesus has filled my every need as a single woman. That need to be cherished, loved, and known. I can't think of a time where He hasn't been there. I would wake up and He surprised me every morning with a new picture of the sunrise, I'd go outside and He'd surprise me with a flowers new bloom, He'd speak to me through people and sometimes He'd speak to my very heart. And through His word He would remind me of His everlasting love for me. And that He was all I needed.  And Valentines day was no longer lonely. It was a special day I would set a side for Jesus and I. And yes, I would still watch romance movies. And I would be glad. Because I know my relationship with Jesus was so much more special and deeper then Hollywood's. And He had a special and more romantic plan for my love life with my husband. Better than Hollywood can comprehend. Not only did giving my single life to God grow my relationship with Him, fill a lonely void in my heart but also, giving my single life to God gave me hope for the future! I didn't have to worry about whether or not I would ever get married. I knew it was His plan. I just needed to be patient.

God works much faster than some people think.
A lot of women give up and get into relationships themselves because they say God isn't working fast enough for them. But that is a nasty trick the enemy can use to bring you further from God. I have known people who have turned their back on God and have decided to do things their way and the only thing that has come out of it was heartbreak one way or another. It either ended up with abuse, divorce, singleness for a much longer period of time and depression. And some women are left being a struggling single mom. But that is not God's plan for your life at all! He wants to give you life and life more abundantly. If you are feeling like your already waiting a billion years. Keep reading His word, seek Him. He has answers for you. He works faster than you think. In fact He never stops working on your future. He is preparing both you and the man He has for you. I was the only one out of all my friends that didn't have a boyfriend. And of course at times I was discouraged. But here is an example of God working faster than most people think. and here's my testimony that if you wait on God to bring you your future husband you won't be disappointed. 
I met my future husband Leon. Actually when we were fourteen at a friends birthday party. He was a cool goth kid. And I was a naive girl that was boy crazy. We were both attracted to each other but for some reason we didn't exchange numbers or keep contact. Most likely because my mom didn't want me to be involved with some goth boy. And then a few years later at the age of eighteen I saw him again. He was a maintenance and security man at a Church I was involved in at the time. And as soon as I saw him I new who he was. Which is quite strange because he looked COMPLETELY different from when I first met him. He was no longer that goth kid I met that day. He was very nicely put together, muscular and smelled amazing! And just by looking at him I could tell he was a very spiritual man. And I didn't know this at the time. But I believe God was speaking to my heart that day that he was going to be the man I would one day marry. And that day seriously came sooner than I thought. We became friends that January, became closer friends that April, had my first date that July, had my very first boyfriend that September, got engaged that November and we were married by December of 2011 at the age of twenty. The Lord brought us together within two years. You can read more about our love story here.

A life with no regrets.
There are so many more testimonies you can find on how fast God works and even better how Awesome God works! Like Rebecca St James. She was married in her early thirties to the love of her life! She lived her entire single life fully devoted to God through her music and now she and her husband are now sharing a life together in fully dedication to God. She had many nights wondering if she would ever get married. And God was always there with her. To comfort, love and cherish. And being married in her early thirties she never regrets giving her single life to God. And she has such a joy in her spirit that is amazingly beautiful. A joy only God could give her. When I met her that one October day at Panera Bread. I saw on her a woman with no regrets. And that's exactly what God wants to give you. A life with no regrets.

Diamond among thorns.
The Lord planted a image in my heart this morning of a diamond among thorns. And  it was hard to get to the diamond without getting pricked or hurt by the thorns. What does this image mean do you ask? Well, The diamond represents a desire, a dream. In this case maybe a husband. And reality is that if you stick your hand in the thorny bushes to grab it. your hand and arm will come out all scratched up. The thorns represents things that are getting in the way of what you want. They also represent the worldly men. You don't have to go through the thorns to get your diamond. You don't have to go through heartbreaks to find your future husband either. Many say that heartbreaks are apart of life, heartbreaks help you grow up and that heartbreaks turn you into the person you were meant to be. But truth is. That's all wrong. God created relationships not to be stressful, drama filled, broken and a bad memory. He created relationships to be only beautiful, lovely and something worth treasuring! He doesn't want you to find your way through the thorns but He wants to bring the diamond to you so you wont get hurt by the things the world brings. He wants you to live a life scare free!

So this is what God has really put in my heart today. He wants you to know that He loves you more than any boy or man could! And He wants to show you a love that no man can fill. All you have to do is trust Him and give your life to Him. And He will fill every void, cherish and fill your every need. And wake you up in the morning with a smile on your face. I deeply encourage you to give your single life to Christ. Because then you will realize that being single isn't such a curse like you think it is. But it's really a blessed life!

The verse I leave with you today is a verse that has helped me so much during my single life and God still uses it to speak to me today!  It's Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you. Declares The Lord. Plans that will prosper you and not harm you. Plans that will give you hope and a future!
Be blessed my sisters!

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Personal thoughts on blogging and what has been on my heart lately.

                            My tongue is the pen of a ready writer
                                                                        Psalms 45:1

Recently I have been asking, questioning, and reminding myself  why do I blog? Why do I write? I started seriously blogging about a year ago just as a online journal between The Lord and myself. I didn't consider myself as a blogger  either because I never really looked at anyone's blogs, and I wasn't very experienced in the blogging media. I didn't have a daily writing plan. When I felt led to write, I wrote. When The Lord laid something upon my heart I shared, and when something exciting happened in my life I wrote down the great memories.  I honestly don't know how many viewers I have.  Whether you are a follower or just passing through. I just want you to know that I love and appreciate you! I created this blog for the Glory of God. And recently I had to ask myself if that still stands. To be honest I have very much gotten caught up with the blogging media. I have pushed myself to try and write every day like so many bloggers often do, I have went out of my way to share my blogs with others. I felt the need to fill the expectations of bloggers so that I may fit in with the blogging media. But did I forget that I wasn't made to fit in? I was made to stand out along with my blog. I had to remind myself that this blog isn't for my glory. It is for the glory of God. I created it to be a blessing to Him and to those who stumbled upon it. I created it for Him to be the writer. And for me to be the pen He uses. Not a blessing or pat on the back to me. But my deepest desire is that He will look down on this blog and smile. I have seen so many go out of their way to make their blog known, I have seen so many discouraged and even give up because their blog only had forty followers to none. I have seen so many struggle to keep their blog up to date so that the media won't forget about them.
But that is not why I have started a blog. I didn't start a blog to get discouraged. I started a blog to bless the discouraged, I didn't start a blog to get lost in the media, I started a blog to be a light in the media. And I certainly didn't start a blog to fit in or to get millions of followers. I created a blog to stand out from millions of bloggers. To be different. So, I am writing to you today with a repentant heart. That I am done. I'm not done with blogging but I am done with the worldly media. That desire to want to fit in, to go out of my way to get followers. to comment on so many blog pages so that people can see me, and writing every day for popularity. I am here for one purpose and that is to glorify my God. And for Him to use me to be a blessing to others. So yes, I will continue to blog. But I will blog when I feel led to blog, When I want to blog, and when I have something to blog about. I am no longer going to blog just to blog. Because I believe that if  you are going to take time to read my blog. I want The Lord to use me to give you something to take with you. So that reading it will not be a waste of your time. I want you to be blessed and blessed abundantly every time you come and visit.I know longer desire to be a famous blogger because I know my blog is famous in Heaven. And Jesus reads it every day! What's cooler than that right? So this is my mission statement, No longer will this blog be for the glory of man. But again may my blog only serve one purpose. To glorify God. And to bless all who stumble upon it. I pray you are deeply blessed today! Xoxo

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Let's pray for the ones affected by abortion.

Honestly if you sit down and really think about abortion. It's sadistic beyond measure. It should be an unthinkable practice. Let's continue to Pray for those affected by it.

Last Wednesday a  woman appeared at a OWC to abort her twin baby girls. The only reason she gave for aborting them is that she already had daughters and didn't want anymore. She was twenty weeks! Many of you have no idea stuff like this happens. I have spoken to people about Abortion and how dangerous it is not only for the child but also for the woman. And that the only thing abortion does is kill.. It kills the unborn child that had life, potential, and spirit and it leaves the mother wounded, full of regret and shame. You see there is not just one victim here,  but two.

I have spoken to many on the topic's of abortion. To co-workers,debaters, friends and family. And I have also spoken on it a few times on my blog. here. And every one I have talked to that is for abortion has absolutely no knowledge of it. And it makes me so angry to see so much ignorance in America, It makes me so angry that Abortion is one of the biggest procedures in America, And it makes me so angry that America, the country that was founded on Christianity, The country that our four Fathers have fought for and put precious time into says that killing children is alright. And according to President Obama they are even a mistake. And everyone I have talked to don't even understand what's really going on. Some told me they only allow abortions for emergency purposes, some say abortions are only legal for women who are in their first trimester ( Which even if it was, do they not know that first trimester babies have a heartbeat that starts to beat within six weeks of pregnancy? And that the first trimester is when they develop everything they need including something as simple as fingernails?)  And it would be a shock to some when I tell them that Abortion is legal in America up to the day you give birth.” In fact, in our nation’s capital, there are two doctors who “specialize” in abortions this late in pregnancy. One of those doctors has been working with a suspended license for several years. The Partial Birth Abortion Ban only stopped the use of that procedure late in a woman’s pregnancy. Now, as long as the baby is dismembered before removing him or her from the womb, it’s perfectly legal. Look up the laws in your state. Keep in mind that in any state that has exceptions for the health of the mother, this can mean that if a woman has bad heartburn that’s a threat to her health. A late term abortion starts around $2,000 and can go up to about $15,000 depending on how far along a woman is in her pregnancy.. It leaves me sad as a pregnant woman that many women would do anything to have their children with them and that some women will pay thousands of dollars to have them removed. And it also saddens me as a pregnant woman that people are saying because of their ignorance that children are not alive in their womb. But let me tell you that is the biggest lie! From experiencing pregnancy from trimester one to hitting the third trimester in a few weeks, I have seen my baby and she is most defiantly alive, and not only alive she is a baby with all the qualifications to be so. I heard her heartbeat at eight weeks, I saw pictures of her, I saw her moving, kicking, jumping and trying to get the sonogram camera out of her space, and last time I was there I saw her sleeping, I feel her kicks, punches, hiccups and even her full body moving. I see her character developments, personality, likes and dislikes. She is not some extra body part in me that I push out within the 9th month, shes not a wart, or a clump of tissue. I'm carrying a human being, a baby.  And when a country says it's okay to murder a baby. Their is great evil going on there.

Some of you who are reading this may not have known I was so passionate about stopping abortion. And what brought this post today was reading about this woman I mentioned earlier in my post that was pregnant at 20 weeks with her twin precious girls. At twenty weeks these girls have been kicking, bonding, punching, and doing things babies do together. And now because of one woman not wanting them, they wont have a chance to grow any further and to live their life. I have watched many documentaries on the Holocaust.  I have seen and read about the great evil Hitler has done to Jews just because they were not German. And I will also tell you what I see when I watch those documentaries, when I read those books. I see the very work in Abortion. I see women having abortions because they just don't want the responsibility, or because she feels she has to many kids etc, I see doctors who know that they are children and that they have potential and that they are living human beings but do not tell the mother that because they are afraid of loosing their precious dollar. So they would rather destroy a precious life. Leaving the mother to live with doubt and shame, I also see women who have actually died from loosing too much blood during an abortion procedure.  And the sad thing is stuff like this happens more then once everyday. And because of ignorance people don't see or care. Their was many people to offered this woman financial help, many offered to adopt her daughters. But she decided to do what was more convenient for her and that was to kill them. She aborted the twin girls in her womb even though many offered  every kind of help she would ever need ready for her. She admitted that she didn’t want girls and that she had no compassion for the babies she was carrying. Through a two day process, she actually had to go into labor and deliver her sweet babies into a toilet. Abortions like these happen all over the country every day.

How can this happen? Why is this happening. I am disgusted that this could happen without a revolution rising to overflow the government that  would accept the murder of innocent children as the status quo.
 I know it’s controversial to say this, but abortion truly is the holocaust of my generation. What if we had the bodies of 50,000,000 babies piled on top of each other in a museum somewhere? What if we took all of the clothes they will never wear and toys they will never play with and you had to pay to see them? If each of us had to watch a late term abortion, surely there would be a revolution, right?
 After the Holocaust ended, German civilians were taken to Buchenwald concentration camp to see the atrocities that happened there. Over and over they were heard saying, “We didn’t know.” Now, because of the internet and social media, we have no excuse for ignorance. The hands of America are covered with blood…perhaps their eyes and ears are covered as well. 

I'm not writing this post to bash the Pro- choice companion, I'm not writing this post to condemn women who have had abortions. So please don't think or assume that I am. I love and care about every one of you. I just want you guys to do your research, to watch videos that have been posted and made about the dangers of abortion. And a topic like this cannot be sugar coated. I know I usually don't write hardcore like this. But today I just had to let everyone know what was on my heart. And I really felt led to write about this today. Check out this website  here to get more information on the matter.

Monday, August 13, 2012

27 weeks and 13 more to go!

Time is going by so fast. When I looked at my Baby Gaga App this morning I noticed that I'm due in exactly thirteen more weeks! Honestly I was a little worried about being pregnant for forty long weeks. Mainly because I don't have a career to past the time with. but this pregnancy so far is actually going by pretty speedy.  And I'm enjoying every minute of it! I'm even trying to enjoy the not so comfortable parts of pregnancy because it wont be much longer before our little princess is here! I have so many goals right now to keep me busy as a stay at home wife.  Just to pass the time and to keep myself busy before she enters the world. Such as catching up on my scrap booking (Still haven't even done my wedding yet!)  getting more organized,  scheduling a maternity shoot,  improving on my instruments, finishing books I have procrastinated on reading, writing my devotional, and doing more things with my husband, like going to the historic part of Maryland and I'm also kinda hoping we could celebrate our ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY early so we can maybe go somewhere for a weekend without me thinking of our baby. I guess as a first time mom I feel like December would be to early  to leave her over night.  So many goals and thirteen more weeks to accomplish! Yes, I can do this. =D
Impressive physical developments of the week: My baby's  lungs are already capable of breathing air as her vascular system can now handle oxygen/carbon exchange and her brain stem can now regulate rhythmic breathing as well as her  basal body temperature! Fascinating right!?

    Baby States!  1. How along:27 weeks!!
2. Baby's size:
About 14.5 in

 3. Weight: 2 lbs
4. Maternity Clothes: I'm actually really starting to like these maternity pants. At first they were a bit weird because I wasn't used to having pants come up past my belly button but they are super supportive and comfortable now!5. sleep: Last night I had absolutely no sleep!  She was being a little boxer last night, plus I think I'm starting to feel my baby starting to flip in birthing position. My midwife said it was about that time!
6. Symptoms I have:
I've never had to pee this much EVER!
7. Doctor’s Appointment:
I have another one September 3rd. I'm actually going to be getting my blood work done with that app instead of my last one because it was really hectic there. I had to wait one hour and a half to be seen because they were behind schedule.
Kicks, punches, hiccups, body movements. Loving it!!
9. Belly Button: 
It looks about half way popped! Maybe more so.
10.  Best moment of the week:
Watching Mr. Riley bond with our princess. Still the sexiest think ever! 11.Food cravings: Still the same old at the moment. I still haven't had any crazy cravings like sardines and Ice cream. Yes! I am saying that as a good thing!  And I am still wanting Panera Bread for Breakfast, lunch and dinner!
 12. Foods I've been staying away from: Italian dressing.... blah!
13. Gender: 

 14. What I'm looking forward to: Hitting that thirty weeks! Can't wait. I want to celebrate at Panera Bread!

By the way! I thought I would share this with you.. Yep it's a beautiful red leaf that beautifully stood out from the green ones. I found it on my morning walk. I am so excited for fall! And during my whole walk I was really thanking Jesus for the changes of season.
Are you excited for fall? Do you have any advice or Pregnant memories you'd like to share with this pregger momma?