Monday, September 30, 2013

Step out in faith.

Do you ever find it hard to step out? We're always so fearful of making the wrong decisions or pursuing something because we're afraid that it may not be in God's plan for us, or dreaming big because of the fear of failure..

Being a worship leader has always been something that has been on my heart.
 Talking and loving on Jesus through music has always been my favorite way of expressing my love for Jesus because there are no limits and there is nothing more intimate.

I prefer to sing praise to Jesus instead of speaking praises to Him.. Which are both very highly important.

I prefer Singing in tongues instead of speaking them because singing I feel clears my mind more and allows The Holy Spirit to move.

In fact If my life could just be a musical where I sing every sentence I feel as though my mood and insight on things would always be better.. However, I think eventually I'd drive everyone nuts!

I love to worship but have always doubted the fact that a worshiper was my calling. Maybe it was because I compared myself to easily to other worship leaders.. Speaking poison over myself by saying I wasn't as good as others, and that I wasn't qualified to lead.

One thing I have learned on this journey my friends is that Comparison is the main thing that can keep you from doing what God has called you to do.

It has for me for a long time. I got so easily lost in watching leaders worship God.. And instead of getting lost in worship with them I would throw myself a party with Pity and claim that I would never be good enough..

Comparing. It needs to stop! It's such a worldly thing that is encouraged in our generation so much.. It's in magazines, TV.. Pretty much anything media. I believe it's one of the enemy's biggest tools. But you don't have to be affiliated with that. When things pop into your head telling you "You'll never look like that!" You'll never be as good!" Start speaking truth over yourself!

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. Psalm 139:14

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. -Phil 4:13

I think another thing is that we go about waiting on the Lord all wrong.. We sometimes believe that we just need to sit here and expect God to hand everything to us. But it doesn't work that way at all. and it has taken me a long time to process this.

I believe we sometimes get so caught up in whether or not this is our calling that we miss our opportunity to bless God. I don't believe it's God's will for us to be a couch potato.. I actually know it's not!

He wants us to live, and step out in faith.. He can't guide our footsteps if we don't start walking.
We need to stop thinking about whether or not something is our calling and just start moving, and stepping out in faith. God will be blessed and He will bless you.

If you feel led to be a worshiper don't just sit there and wait for them to call you and ask if you would audition but get in there and get involved and if it happens to not be your calling well then at least you will know and can open your mind and allow The Hold Spirit to plant you elsewhere. And the same goes for everything else. Acting, writing, painting. (etc) He's gotta plan for you girlfriend, but He can't move if you don't.

I totally feel like this post is like popcorn.. It's everywhere! So sorry about that. I'm feeling quite passionate about this right now because I actually did it.

For almost two whole years I have debated, questioned and wondered whether or not being a worship leader was my calling. I've always had a desire to do so but never had the guts to just step out of my comfort zone.

But two weeks ago I stepped out. I was tired of this feeling of missing out, I was tired of excuses, and tired of waiting.. And I'm positive Jesus  was done with waiting on me too!

So, after thought and prayer I sent my pastor a message on facebook.. (professional right?)

This is what I wrote Him.

Heather: Hey Pastor Joe!! I was 100% positive I had your email address in my email book but I can't seem to find it anywhere! Tried to be more professional but that didn't quite work out lol.. Anyways, I have been praying and thinking (a little too much!) About my calling in life.. I know I have a calling with ministering to women of all circumstances and I know now I also have a calling for worship. Worship is something I have always had a heart for.. But I spent a lot time wondering whether or not it was an actual calling.. And doubted it was my calling when I compared my voice to others because personally I don't really like my singing voice. But if God does and if He can use it so be it! A lot has kept me from stepping up into volunteering my voice at church. Fear being the biggest issue. Because I have never led worship for a Church so thirsty for Jesus. It terrifies me.  Anyways, I feel like I'm all over the place here.. I just want you to know that God has put a calling on my life to worship and I'm not 100% sure I'd be dependable of being the actual worship leader until I no longer depend on a ride there so I was thinking until then just singing a song every now and then and see where that goes. What are your thoughts Papa Joe?

Just so you know He's not my real papa. He's more like a Spiritual dad to Leon and I. Evelynne calls him Grandpa Joe. This was his response.

Pastor Joe: You are so precious Heather, I will stand in agreement with you concerning your calling. Lets set up Sunday the 29th as your first opportunity to sing a special song for us. This should give you some time to select a song and prepare for the service. Thank you for sharing, you are a blessing to all of us.

Heather:  Sounds good!! 

The whole "sounding good" part was a totally step out in faith! After he said "two weeks" my whole insides shook.. I haven't sung publicly in three years and never in front of my Church family whose love for The Lord means so much to me along with their desire to go deeper in His presence daily. I wanted God to use me to help with that! So, I rebuked nervousness and decided and turn it into rejoice. And the last two weeks I rejoiced, practiced, and rejoiced again. And the 29th of Sunday quickly came.

Before I knew it I was sitting there in the front. Seconds before my name was called out I totally forgot my lyrics.. So, I kept repeating it in my mind and  received the Holy Spirit to help me remember.. He did a great job and we make a great team!
I realized yesterday that even if a worship Leader isn't my calling in life. At least I'll know by stepping out. It is not a situation where I'd lose. Because God would have the glory of my stepping out in faith and He would be pleased with the worship I brought Him.. Besides I believe we are all called to worship. It's why He first created us is it not? To love and adore our One True God? I know it's why I was created because I can't get enough. Worshiping Him is what I long to do for the rest of my life.

Darlings, today I want to encourage you to step out. I want to encourage you to chase your dreams with every strength that God has put in your body and just run and keep running until you win.

                         There's this sign at church that I absolutely love that says:
               Our greatest glory lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

Don't be afraid to fall  Lovelies, because Jesus will always be there to pick you back up every time! 
But have perseverance and never give up! God's gotta plan for you but you need to start taking steps so that He can direct you.

                                              Much love xoxo- Heather Leigh 


Sarah Nicole said...

Your pastor is right Heather! You are SO precious to The Lord! I am so proud of you! :):):)

Rachel Marie Brown said...

This is jam packed with a million popcorn kernels of truth :) I am so glad you stepped out in faith and are encouraging us all to do the same. May God bless your courage and faith...and use you in ways unexpecting - to bless others...through love, music, and just your pure heart of compassion <3